Listening is such a powerful skill to develop. Even though we can speak the same language, the same way, we understand that language in vastly different terms. When we speak to people, we have no idea if they really understand what we have said unless they respond. This requires good listening.
Even when we listen, repeating back what they have said helps validate what we heard. This will help with the person feeling heard and us understanding their version of the language we are communicating with. Yet even this isn’t enough.
Curiosity combined with listening will reveal another layer under what people are saying to you. Beliefs are the spoken words of deeper stories. The stories are the places where our needs live and connect us to the world. If you learn to hear this layer, then you can give a gift to their needs. The place where our needs lives forms the seed that love can sprout out of.
Yet many of us have had these seeds of needs wounded by people in our lives or situations out of our control. Waiting for the day for someone or something to come and water that need with the care and love and attention that for some never arrive.
Seeds sprout even under the worst conditions. I have seen grass and flowers sprout between the sidewalk. Alone and living in a strange distorted story. Our ability to listen and speak with beauty could help those we know transplant those needs into more fertile soil. A great gardener of life through listening and curiosity knows the right timing. May we all become great gardeners helping each other to heal and making this world a more beautiful place.
